To Whom It May Concern

Dear Weather,

Seriously?!

Love,
Amy


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Dear Body,

The baby is 3-1/2 months old.  Can we quit with the post-pregnancy hormones already?  I'm over it.  I have pimples like a teenager and I'm going bald.  Enough already.

Love,
Amy

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Dear Van,

Next time I'm getting the self-cleaning model.  If they can make an oven that can heat up enough to incinerate the baked on crud, surely they can make a minivan that gets hot enough inside to incinerate goldfish and Grips cookies.

Love,
Amy

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Dear Keebler,

Obviously you didn't test Grips on any actual children, or consult any parents.  Worst.  Idea.  Ever.

Please send some elves to clean this up.

Love,
Amy

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Darling Daugthers,

If you're going to insist on cutting paper into teeny tiny pieces all day, please don't whine at me when I make you clean them up.  You're a lot closer to the floor, anyway.  Just like the elves. 

Love,
Mommy

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