Monday, July 2, 2012

Staying In My Bubble

I live in a bubble.

Photo by zzub nik via Flickr
I am surrounded by people who are educated, who avoid drama, who have good manners, and who are good citizens.  We don't necessarily agree on every issue, but if we talk about something we don't agree on, we can do so with respect for each other.  If these people have kids, they're awesome parents.  If they have careers, they're awesome at those.  Some of them are awesome at both.  Most of them are passionate about whatever it is they do - from anthropology to zoology.  I have a bunch of friends who are teachers and professors, so we talk a lot about ideas and the future.  Lots of our friends are leaders in their company or their industry.  They're just interesting people.

In other words, I have some seriously kick-ass friends and family, y'all.

I used to know quite a few drama-magnets, and I just don't talk to them anymore.  I'm not saying that I dump friends if they go through something tough.  We all have stuff happen that is outside of our control.  I am talking about the sort of people who seek out drama, and when there isn't any to be found they create it - I don't stick around people like that.  Toxic people have no place in my life.

And because I work for BJ, and we don't have co-workers, we don't have much work drama.  Sure, sometimes stuff happens that is frustrating, but we deal with it because it's mostly just us.  We have business partners, customers, vendors, subcontractors, etc. and we deal with them, but they're all professionals.  Honestly, if someone at work cheeses me off, I find a way to not have to deal with them anymore - either by finding another vendor or dealing with someone else at their company.  I just don't have to deal with difficult people at work very often (and we work with the federal government, so that's pretty impressive).

I figure my time is limited and I'm not going to waste it on people who drive me nuts.

I don't watch the news (I read the news - it's different that way), and I try to avoid stories that will upset me (if some kid gets beaten and abused and kidnapped and I hear about it or read about it, it's only going to upset me.  The chances of me finding that kid are a zillion to one, so I'm not going to pay attention to it.  This policy works as well as Zoloft for managing my anxiety).  I still know what's going on in the world, but those "if it bleeds it leads" human interest type stories?  Avoid.

So.  When it happens that I am forced to deal with someone who IS a drama magnet, or who enjoys being difficult, or who likes disagreeing for the sake of disagreeing, or who is just mean or evil, it's always shocking.  I guess that shows that I've done an amazing job of insulating myself.

I could go into detail about the people who keep trying to pop my bubble (in fact, I did, for about 7 paragraphs, before I deleted it just now), but I won't.  I'm just not going to put that much energy into their negativity.  I'm not going to give them that kind of power over me.

Photo by Lagged2Death via Flickr
The thing I have to remember, is to not let the negative people drag me out of my bubble.  I can't let them make me negative, too.  Maybe that would be a useful visualization, when I'm getting angry at the bubble-poppers of the world, to imagine that I am in a bubble rising above it all...  Just floating clear of the drama and the hate and the negativity into the beautiful clear blue sky.

Photo by StellaJo1976 via Flickr
Just float.

1 comment:

Rob Monroe said...

Just bought a book at Target last night about a woman who intentionally looked at studies and wives tales and such to make her life happier - stuff like singing in the morning! We left most of the stress behind when we moved, our biggest issue left is money. We have intentionally surrounded ourselves with positive people, and it really does make a difference!

Good for you!