Friday, July 25, 2008

Return of the Killer Zucchini

I went to the store before I took the kids to Dawn's, today, and stocked up on eggs, oil, flour, and foil pans. I came home prepared to, nay, excited about tackling the Great Zucchini Bread Bake of '08.

In the spirit of The Pioneer Woman, I now present, Zucchini Bread, an illustrated recipe....

I was unsure how to proceed, because I didn't know how many cups of zucchini I was dealing with. I decided to shred one and find out...

It was seven and a half cups. That meant I was dealing with 37.5 cups of zucchini. Each recipe calls for 2 cups, and yields 2 loaves. 37.5 divided by two, carry the one....

We're dealing with a crapton of zucchini bread.

I chose the recipe for Zucchini Bread IV on Allrecipes because I like Roman numerals, and because it had super reviews. (I just love it when people leave reviews that say something like, "I took out all the zucchini and added salmon and currants, because that's what I had on hand, and this didn't come out right at all!!")

I figured I could double the recipe and make 4 regular-sized loaves per batch, since I have a big ol' Kitchenaid Mixer. I love my Kitchenaid Mixer. If I were a Pioneer Woman, I would tell you to leave a comment and the randomly chosen winner would win a Kitchenaid Mixer.

I am not Pioneer Woman. That's why she is greatly beloved, and I am just a half-baked Mommyblogger. Maybe when I grow up I'll be able to afford to give away mixers... For now, you get a picture of the "cast of characters."

Anyway, step 1. Beat eggs until "light and frothy."

I hate ambiguous directions. I want something like "Beat eggs for 2 minutes on medium speed." Maybe it's because I'm an engineer's wife, but I don't know how to quantify "light and frothy."

I guess that's close enough.

Step 2: Get a call from your sister and talk to her, completely forgetting to take further pictures.

That's ok, no problem, I have 30 more cups of zucchini to practice with!

Step 2: Mix in sugar and oil. Do things out of order and add the vanilla first. If you want to be like me, refrain from measuring the vanilla.

Take a moment and feel overly-sensitive about lollypop thumbs.


There's a ride at the fair that feels just like this.

Next step - combine flour, cinnamon, soda, baking powder, salt, and nuts.

Does anyone ever do this? What a waste of a clean bowl! I just dump everything in, saving the flour and nuts for last (because some of my farmers don't like nuts in their bread).

Doesn't that look awesome?

Here it is all mixed up:

Start to get a little worried about exactly how much zucchini you have left in the bowl. Count the remaining zucchini. Four. Be afraid.

Wonder about all the water in the bottom of the bowl.


Wonder about my lollypop thumb.


Add cinnamon (just guess, I won't tell).

All right! It's looking good - where are the pans?

Oh, wait, I forgot to add the flour.

At this point, I'm getting very nervous about how I'm going to fit 6 cups (remember, I doubled) in this mixer. I hold my breath (as if that will help).


Fire your help...

Don't let her cute face fool you, she's a union organizer.

Fill the pans. This was batch 3, the chocolate walnut batch. My personal favorite.

The little loaves (and I made 15, so I'm somewhat of an expert) baked for 45 minutes at 325. The big ones (yield - 6 loaves, or one doubled batch), baked for an hour.

Get a little nervous about the amount of zucchini you still have, even though you've made 21 loaves of zucchini bread:

Decide to freeze it and confuse everyone with zucchini bread in January.

Freak out when you realize that it's not over yet!

Here are the big loaves:


Let's try it!

I'm only a little embarassed that we ate this for dinner. It was awesome! The recipe deserves all the great reviews.


Rob Monroe said...

Holy Cow! Save the last one for your party. A little olive oil and salt - toss it on the grill. :o)

Oh yeah, and mail me a loaf of bread!

dorindmikey said...

wow that looks awesome, i would love to try that, i never had any type of zuchinni bread. the only time i even tried it was back in europe. they slice it, soak it in egg and then cover it in breadcrumbs and fry it up, it didn't really taste like anything...

adymommy said...

Great googly moogly that is a lot of bread!

Now I am hungry will you send me a loaf?

You had me laughing until the end. Great post!

Jeana said...

Awesome! I bet you didn't want to post this but Marlbro Man made you.

Heather said...

1. Lollipop thumbs? What color is the sky on your planet?

2. Fried zucchini is an excuse to imbibe yummy things like melted butter, egg batter, and salt. Do so asap.

3. I've always thought zucchini bread tasted like banana bread - now I understand that it's because allllll the spices are the same. If you need to see if anyone else is willing to eat a loaf as dinner, call me. We can do a hostage exchange for MG's pajamas.

Have the T-Shirt said...

Lord, that was quite and endeavor. Your union organizer is adorable! You can't fire her, she'll bring a suit against you :P

It's a well known fact that the act of cutting into a zucchini instantly causes it to triple in size and yours were already big enough to begin with.

The end result sure looks yummy :)

Mimi said...

Awesome!!! Looks great!

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe the reason for mixing together the dry ingredients first is because the more that flour is mixed the more gluten is released. (Causes it to get hard instead of "light and fluffy")

Lollipop thumbs are nothing to be ashamed of. I'd post a picture if I could.....

Mimi again said...

You could make zucchinni cakes! Like crab cakes, but with zucchinni instead.

Anonymous said...

Zucchini lasagna is also good (you use sliced Zucchini in place of the noodles.

Heather @ Not a DIY Life said...

Wow!! They look scumpdillicious!!!! And great pics too!

I have a zucchini pizza recipe on my recipe blog -

Barbara said...

I love you and your lollipop thumbs. This post had me laughing so hard. I will have to show it to Jeannine; she has lollipop thumbs too! William and I eat zucchini all the time and I love zucchini bread, but i have never dared to make it. Your blog has inspired me to take the plunge.